P.T. Barnum Was Right!


Pink headband

You just can't win


I think I figured this one out when I was pretty young. I used to buy those Legg pantyhose and without a doubt there was a run in them the very first time I put them on, but what a surprise, a coupon inside good for another pair. I was cynical already at 13. I told my gf’s this is very suspicious and I believed that they probably placed little pinholes in those panythose so that they would run immediately. I mean I put them on just the way they instructed, and no matter how delicate, they would run. But they had great advertising campaigns and came in those cute little eggs that everyone wanted, so of course we would go buy them again.

Yesterday, I had to have my car fixed. This car has been nothing but trouble since day one, but it’s been making a lot of noise for months now and since the engine light just went on after I also placed 4 quarts of oil in the other day, I thought, it’s time.

I can’t stand this more than anything else, because most people know, auto mechanics will find all kinds of things wrong with your car, even the things you didn’t ask about.

Well, I told them the problem and they said they’d call back later with some answers after the $90 diagnostic was complete. It was a tensioner belt, and I needed new tires on the back, which I knew as well. “Go ahead, but the cheapest ones are fine, since I don’t really know how long I’m going to keep this car.”

He tells me the engine light is due to the transmission and will have to be taken to another place that specializes in transmission. It may be minimal, or it may not, but he suggested I do it as soon as possible.

I pick up my car later and my ex husband drives it for a while. He is telling me the rpms are way out of whack. He understands this a lot more than I do and he also happens to have the same car. Then he says, “your tires are really wobbly too!” He gets out and looks at them. He sees that they look like they have been balanced, but they are not feeling balanced. “Maybe one is defective he says.”Next, my a/c is blowing hot and cold and now I’m furious!

“You know, I’m sick and tired of taking something in to get it fixed and getting it back in worse condition.” So, now I call the guys and they tell me to bring it back. Here’s another day wasted, I’m thinking.

By the time I bring it back the guy is telling me all kinds of stories about the a/c. How it just happened to go out at that time. What a coincidence. Of course it had nothing to do with them. Then he gives me a list. Now here we go, I’m thinking. Here some other things we sabotaged, er I mean we noticed, Now he proceeds to tell me all of these things that are “potential safety issues.” He used the words “Potential safety issues,” so many times, to put fear into me. I was assuming this was part of their training to sell, sell, sell!

He told me my Struts were really messed up. It took me back in my mind to a Strut your stuff, contest I  had won, when I was younger in a bar. I had won the whole Bob Seger album collection for having the best Strut for the song, Her Strut. At the end of the song I did the splits. Now my mind returned to the mechanic as he was using his screwdriver to pull all this dusty grime out of the “struts,” as he was telling me there was no cushioning left here. Hmmm, I thought, that is just like my struts. And I wonder what Bob Seeger is doing these days. I bet he’s got one of those handicap parking stickers in his car.

Then when he got to the wobbly wheels I naturally thought of my shoulder.  Tensioner belt, sounding all too familiar.

The transmission. is a little messed up.The inner workings of this vehicle running everything. Well, I guess I’m just going to have to put more into this thing to keep it going, until I think it’s time to give up.

I’m just glad that the Lord doesn’t give up on us.