The Dim Bulb


I am watching Saturday Night Live and I’m just cracking up. It is a skit called, White People’s Problems, and I swear we had some people just like this on our flight last night.

Charles Barkley just said, “Man that problem is so white it should go snowboarding!” I was rolling! I had to think of the woman we were talking about. We just couldn’t figure her out.

The flight attendant I was working with said, she had first stopped her to say, “You know you guys need to advertise more to let people know you have food.” She obviously ate before getting onboard. But most people know we offer food.

Later she asked me for a club soda and a cranberry juice. After a while my flying partner told me she seemed to be too young to have this attitude. But she said, every time I walk by her she seems annoyed. She was right. She came to the back and in her most pretentious voice,she asked “Do you have spritzers?” I said, wine spritzers? “No,” and as if I was just stupid, she repeated herself. “Like spritzers.” “Ok,” I said, and before I ever got another word out, she acted irritated and said, “Just give me a ginger ale!” “Well, no if you mean juice and club soda, like you had earlier,that is a spritzer,””No” she said.I was thinking she really didn’t like being told that it wasn’t a premixed concoction. Because in her perfect world everything was what she wanted, and when she wanted it. Anyway, I want to just tell her to chill, the world’s about to end, in another year, so make learn how to make a sprizter….live a little.

Then she went on to the next complaint. “Oh, could you please write up my light, it’s really dim? I’ve been trying to read, and I  am having a hard time.It’s hard to believe she can find time to read with all the trouble she’s trying to stir up. “Is the bulb burnt out?” I ask her? “No It’s just really dim.” Hmm,I know what I was thinking, but I sure didn’t want to say it.

But across the aisle,sure enough, there was a man who could be her match.He was in 19F,and the flight attendant came back to tell me,He had called her over and told her quite abruptly, “You need to turn off this video!  There are only 3 people watching it!” I was cracking up. “What?” Another passenger was standing in back and said, “Hey I heard that guy. It’s a documentary about janitors or something. Maybe it bugs him.” “Well, he really seems mad about it.” My flying partner said. “He actually said that he can see only three people watching it, as it I’m supposed to turn off the video to the whole cabin.”

“I know! Maybe we should get him together with the dim bulb! 

These people are so self-centered. Or maybe it’s just another episode of White Peoples Problems!

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