Falling Down….Again

Help I've Fallen!!!

So, to continue….

I worked a flight from San Francisco to New York. A red-eye. Exhausted. I landed at 7am and ran to the Air Train. Briskly walked the 4 (I think) walkways, and of course, as always, one was not working. But this time, it didn’t get me. I am always amused as we runners, rush onto a non-working walkway. We stop short, and watch those who already see us, rush by. I know they’re thinking the same thing that I’m thinking right now, as I watch the flight attendant run on to come to a screeching halt. Haha! I think. Now, I’ll be ahead in this mad rush to the gates. Hmm, wonder if she’s on the flight to Lauderdale. It’s first come first serve, in this stand by process. So if she’s on my flight, she’s just a  little irritated right now.

I start to gain some speed, and bypass the kiosk, as I know they Never work. I laugh again, as I see this same flight attendant, rush over to one. There’s no way, she’s going to check in before me and she’ll soon find that it doesn’t work for her either. I’m having a little contest in my mind, as I have no idea where she’s heading.

I get through security and have my own system of hitching and unhitching, my rig. Here she comes. About 5 people behind me. Luckily, today, it’s very quiet. Well, after all these are the first flights of the day.

I make it down to my gate, and see that boarding will begin in about 15 minutes. I run over to the little check-in counter and there is a couple standing there. They are excited because they’re going to the Bahama’s. Clearly in no hurry. The man was gracious enough to ask, “Are you in a hurry, cause we have a couple of hours.” I share that I’m on standby, anyway and my flight is the gate right next to us. The agent hears us, and says, “I’ll check you in. This will only take a moment.”

Great. She even gives me a seat assignment. Just as I look up and see my competitor coming toward the counter. “Too late.” I’m thinking. I already got here first. Ahh, yes. But then there are the days when it doesn’t work this way. So I have to enjoy it while I can.

On the flight, a woman takes the aisle seat and there is a seat open in the middle. After the flight attendant tells her, she really is in the premium seats, and he may have to assess a charge. She says, “well if there’s a charge, I’ll go back to my middle seat.” He finds out that they will waive the charges.

After we are in the air, I fall asleep against the window. I wake up to see her, sprawled across the middle seat, and her head is practically in my lap. It’s irritating, since, I can hardly move my arm, without hitting her head, and having a middle seat opened, should have provided us with some room. But now, she didn’t have to pay, and she’s taking two premium seats. I can’t understand why people are so rude, and she had no problems, even when I inadvertently, bumped her head with my elbow a few times.

After we landed, I was even more exhausted. And I looked up to see her staring at me. It was with a seductive look, and it totally creeped me out. Now I’m wondering if she slept on my arm, deliberately. The flight attendants were cracking up. I knew one of them, and she said, “Yea, I noticed she was pretty cozy with you.” I told her, “I know, I felt like I needed a cigarette, when we landed!” At this all of us cracked up.

Now, my daughter picks me up. Since, of course, my lemon is in the shop. I told her I already received a call from my brother’s bus company, at 7am, stating that they were at the front door and my brother wasn’t answering. Hopefully, he came down in time. I try to call his phone, but he almost never answers, unless my mom is with him.

I find out that he did make it in time. Good. Now I start cleaning the kitchen, before I even have a chance to get out of my uniform. No one can pick up after themselves, it seems, and my daughter is the worst violator.

I walk into my living room, to find a bottle of clear nail polish dumped over on the coffee table and two water glasses sitting right there. I was furious! The polish was all over, and I screamed upstairs to my daughter. She comes down in her robe. Never mind that it was 11:30. “You are not going to sleep! You have destroyed my table!” Of course she starts with, “How did that get dumped over?” “Well, obviously, it was sitting here with a cap half off and it was spilled! The bigger problem is that once again, you destroyed something else, and do not take any responsibility!”

I tell her to get something to take it off. Sand it and find a stain that matches to fix it. Of course, I know, she won’t be able to come close to repairing this without seeing this big mess. But the point is, she needs to try. I want her to understand that I’m not fixing her messes, nor am I letting her off the hook, as she begins to whine, “You don’t know what I have to deal with.” How many times can she play this card? “Oh really?” All the thoughts of my whole morning, up to this point, run through my head. The fact that I pay the bills, and make my meager salary stretch, in the face of companies, who don’t take responsiblity for their own errors, along with her, and her destructive and irresponsible behavior. I love my children very much, but when I see how immature my daughter is, I get annoyed. I know that I was pretty much raising myself, and I was an adult at a very young age. Of course, I didn’t want her to grow up like I did, but it had its advantages.

“Oh, you know what? I don’t care!” I am more than angry at this point. I’m tired, and really cranky. I won’t even stand for this nonsense. She’s not going to turn the tables, and try the guilt trip. “I am tired of your behavior. You’re going to be taking the small bedroom, as I get all of your garbage out of the room you trashed. You break things and lose things constantly. Lost two sets of keys, two cell phones, and the charger, just in the last month. And  you expect everyone else to rescue you. I’m not doing it! You always tell me you’re not a child. Well, welcome to adulthood! Now fix that table or you’re paying for it!”

Next, I’m on the phone with my insurance company again. I’m also making calls about my brother and trying to get some of the benefits, he is entitled to. Corruption has all but robbed him, of the services he’s entitled to. The whole mess, is depressing and I’m constantly fight battles for him, as well as my mother.

Now, I need my daughter to leave my space, so I can regroup. I am close to her and it is the reason, I get so angry. I want her to get it. I just called her last week, to tell her that I saw “The Situation,” coming through security. She was thrilled. I know she watches that show, even though it is pointless. However, the few episodes I’ve watched with her, shows me what her age is all about. Pretty sad.

I called last night to tell her I saw David Hasselhoff in LAX. I start to think, it’s amazing how we can be laughing about something, and a short time later, I’m so angry with her. I can’t wait until the roller-coaster ride of her twenties, is over.

The one scripture which kept coming to my mind was, “Do not grow weary in your well doing, for after a  little while, you will reap a harvest of joy.”

Ok, Lord…I’m ready whenever you are!!!

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Carol Ann Hoel
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 15:02:18

    Our children will learn responsibility when it is “their” pocketbooks drained by their behaviors. Life is difficult when children are the age when we think they should know better and behave better and don’t do it. Have patience. Soon their learning time will come. Hang on to your sanity and keep your relationship. Mom and daughter love are more important in the long run. Be stern, but laugh an hour later, as you did, because she’s still your daughter and you love her. Blessings…


    • flygurlual
      Nov 16, 2010 @ 21:11:40

      Thanks Carol,

      I am so glad to get your encouragement. I feel so hurt at times, and it’s made more difficult by lack of support. I cannot tell you how much your words bless me!
      Thank you and may the Lord bless you as well!


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