Why Am I So Special?


He leaves the 99 to go after the one


I was still sick the last few days.  In fact I had to bow out of a fundraiser yesterday. But, when I did, I assumed it was because the Lord did not want me there anyway. 

 I did happen to celebrate Passover and would not fail to give thanks to the Lord for all He had done on this special night. It is so symbolic for all of us, Jew and Gentile and we are approaching Easter as well. 

But last night I was coughing all night again and had finished the round of antibiotics and my side was just aching. 
I must have most run down immune system in the last few years. I have been to the doctor’s and er more than my whole life. This is getting ridiculous. But now I had gone to an urgent care clinic and after all the medicine was over, I was left with more problems and still no answers. I never had the original doctor actually test for anything.
So today I went right to the hospital non emergency clinic for some answers.
Well, before I went my son and daughter prayed for me. I told them I just felt like crap and I was not able to get rid of that pain in my lungs. They could hear me coughing all the time anyway and I’m pretty sure they were getting tired of It was cute to hear my son saying, “and Lord if my mommy feels convicted about anything, let her know what it is.” Why I outta!” lol (Hmmm, then I did..cause immediately I thought, his dad probably taught him to say that) so of course I had to repent immediately. Geesh! What a battle was going on in my mind while my son was praying.
Yes, I know sickness can come from doors that are opened to the enemy in our lives. Sometimes.If a person is suffering or fearful and they have very   obvious sin in their lives, it’s usually a no-brainer. I say that, however, even after telling some people they do not act in obedience to the direction of the Holy Spirit and then it is called grieving the Holy Spirit. Some people are warned by the Lord and He tells them in scripture, “stop sinning or something worse may happen.” I don’t even make mention to people about this, because it just gets into “shooting the messenger.” This is why the prophets in the Old Testaments were never popular. Always a buzz kill.
 But this isn’t always the reason for sickness or tribulation.
Job was a righteous man and remember his friends thought he was being persecuted  by God. The enemy had to receive permission to torment him.His premise was that Job would not be quite so righteous if the Lord didn’t bless Him so much.  So this is not always the case. Sometimes it is a test of our faith. So be careful to bless the Lord at all times.
Earlier in the day I was planting some seeds with my son. He had given me some sunflower seeds and I bought some topsoil. I was raking out the weeds.
I thought of the parable of the seeds and the Lord speaking of ” some seeds falling on stony ground and never taking root. Some fall into the soil and are choked out by weeds.(meaning the cares of this world) Some take root in fertile soil and bear much fruit. He speaks about the seed being planted and the enemy comes to steal the seed the minute it is planted.”
All of this is the word of God as it relates to us. I was really interested in this as I was planting and watching this. I could almost pick out the people in my life that I could compare this to as well. The stony, the weeds, the fertile soil that bore fruit that fed others and had more and more. At one point in my life I looked at “spiritual children”that I had next to me in church and was amazed to see their children and on and on! When the Lord opened my spiritual eyes to this scripture and showed me the true meaning, he reminded me that one day we see all of our fruit that we have ‘born’ for the kingdom when we arrive.
We just keep sowing and planting.
Later my sons dad came over to get him, I told my brother  and my daughter Iwas going to the hospital for some tests and I’d be gone for a little whle.
As I was sitting in the waiting room  there was some kind of turmoil breaking out with a young kid next to me. He was with his mom and dad and he started swearing.
I pulled out a prayer-book that I have in my purse and just began to meditate on some prayers and then I started praying for him and all of the people in the room. I felt the Holy Spirit telling me that I was “preparing the soil.
I saw a man who had been in the other waiting room being wheeled in to this room now. He was staring at me.
Now a police officer was in the room with us and apparently this kid had been the cause of an accident and fled the scene of the crime to come to the hospital. Hmmm, can’t hide from the Holy Spirit. He polices the world. He settled down and the officer told him his options. He still had to leave with crutches.
Now, I’m still praying, praying and something happens. The room, which was full is now empty…except two people. Me and the man in the wheelchair. He stealthily moves from his chair to the chair next to mine.
He moans in great pain and he reeks of alcohol. Whew!
My prayer-book, which is pretty plain. A little book but a bold title…is in hand.
He looks at me and says, “So what are you here for?” haha”Makes me think this is a pattern of behavior for this guy, but whatever the Lord wants.
Now I am starting to realize, that I’m not here for my reasons at all. Yes, that’s right. I’m the Lord’s servant. I go wherever He sends me. Today He brought me here. No, I didn’t have door open except to allow my Lord to send me to Gil. That’s his name.
“Well, I tell him, I went to the doctor and he told me I had bronchitis, but I still have problems with coughing, so I think they have to do x-rays. What about you.”
He tells me”Oh, I was changing the time on a clock and the ladder slipped and I said, wtf?! I fell on my back! ” yes his language was pretty racy even with kids in the room.
“Did the ambulance bring you? “I was going to let them but I decided to drive myself.”
“How could you drive like that? The Lord must have had a legion of angels to protect you,” I said. “Oh, no, I only have one on my right side.” he said
As we continued to talk, he asked me about my life and of course tried the “where’s your husband question.”
Yes,he wanted to know all about my life. I told him about a man who was in prison and he had been so angry and he told me that he didn’t fear men but of the things he didn’t understand he had great fear.This man said, “I can understand that.” Yes, I said, I always thought that was a petty wise statement.
“Hey, do you think I’ve ever been in prison?” He asked me. (Well, I wanted to say, there really isn’t any reason for me to believe you haven’t but I didn’t)
“Have you?”Then he showed me his pinky finger that had been sliced all the way down by the guys when he was released. He was cut down to the tendon and he said “What I did to them wasn’t very nice.” So you returned evil with evil.”
He used some choice words to describe what he did,but in his own way I’m guessing he thought he got his revenge.
At any rate, he was clearly undateable. lol
Seriously, I looked at him and said, do you know I went across the country to see a man before he died? A total stranger.
Another man who was released from prison to give him a birthday cake he’d never had.
At that moment he looked at me as if it had just dawned on him that I was not the woman he had thought I was “you’re not one of those”
“Servants of the Lord?” Oh, yes, when I first saw you sitting in the main lobby I knew it was you.” I told him.
“What?! Why am I so special?”
Now, I saw it…what I see all the time when the Holy spirit touches someone and takes the heart of stone an replaces it with a heart of flesh.
“Because I said, He is the Good Shepherd who leaves the 99 sheep and goes to find the one who is lost.”
“The Lord is concerned about the very least of these and they are the greatest of all to Him.” At this I saw his eyes well up with tears. He wasn’t acting quite as cocky right at this moment.
“Why didn’t he catch me when I fell off the Ladder?”
I started to laugh considering his circumstances, because I was wondering all along if he had been drinking when he was on the ladder, which may have been what cushioned the fall.
“You didn’t die, did you? “No, he answered.
“Well then I’d say He did catch you.  Because, no you didn’t. But He did. die. He died for you.Did you know that?”
“Yes, he said.” As if it really was no big deal. Not as big a deal as him falling off of a ladder anyway.
“I’m Catholic.” Oh, here we go again, with that silly security blanket that can’t do anything for anyone. (A Catholic that also has fallen off of a ladder,hmm…wonder if there’s a saint for that)
“Hey, when you die and stand before the Lord, He sure isn’t going to ask you anything except did you accept HIM  as your savior. PERIOD, END of STORY!!!!
Then he points to his back as if he is a true believer and tells me, ” well I have a tattoo of Philippians 4:13 on me somewhere. It says…Um”
Now I have all the word in me, but I can honestly tell you scripture and verse, I’m not too proficient at, but the Holy Spirit brought it right to the tip of my tongue. And Gil had no idea, what the verse was at all even though it’s written on his own body. I said, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” “That’s right!” He said! “How did you know that?””
“Well, you know what? The only weapon of our warfare that does any harm against the enemy is “the Word of God.” You are wearing it on your body.You need to remember this if someone tells you that you need surgery or you are falling. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
“Are you bs** me?” “No I”m helping you! Do you remember when Jesus was fasting in the desert for 40 days? The devil came to him and said, “Hey , you’re God, why don’t you turn these stones into bread? And the Lord said what? “It is written, Thou shalt not live by bread alone, but by every Word that proceeds from the mouth of God!” So now you have Gods word written on you.  You probably just did it as a fashion statement in prison, but it’s a very powerful tool against your enemy. You have at least one scripture you can use. That’s a start.”
All of a sudden in unison, a woman was banging on the door and a nurse was calling my name. Gil wanted my number, which I was not going to give him.
I would be more than happy to point Him to Christ and to a church, but not engage him in a false hope of following a woman.
He begged please can I have your number. That’s just silly I thought. Like Peter said to the beggar, “silver and gold have I none, but what I have I give to you.’ I mean, I’m offering this man the riches of the kingdom of God and he wants my phone number! I just know that my Lord is laughing with me!
But the Lord will water those seeds if they fell into fertile soil.
My lungs were clear so I thanked the Lord for His healing touch and using me to serve Him any way He chooses.
I started to remember when I had fallen down back in the winter and the little episode with the doctor and his clinic that the Lord had taken me to.
What a strange journey that was and now every time I turn on the news I see another pain clinc being exposed, but it was that doctors day for the Lord to speak. The Lord doesn’t deal with entities. He deals with people. He doesn’t deal with corporations, He deals with souls.And when He does, He sends His servants.
He knows where He sending me because I wont shrink back.
As a servant we must realize that we did not come to this earth to “be served, but to serve.”

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