Whoa To Those Who Call Evil Good And Good Evil


If I have to eat bugs I will.

If I have to eat bugs I will.

Yes, I have been full circle in my own life with people much like this. I call these people centers of their own universe. They don’t even know how delusional they are. They think that their corruption doesn’t harm anyone else, when indeed it brings destruction to everyone around them, until eventually they get caught. Then they are so deluded, that they actually believe they are doing good for the very people they are robbing! They destroy lives and live in such blissful ignorance that when the gavel drops, they moan, “why me?” I’m such a good man.” I just want to throw up. I deal with these people all around me.

All these corrupt men’s hands are in the till and they make  the ones that are honest look bad. We have to just ‘go away.” We aren’t supposed to know what they are doing, so the best solution to that problem is to make us look bad somehow. So they trump up silly charges against us.

Disorganized crime. It’s the oldest game in town. Well, at least that what I call it. It’s rarely organized. Some of the thugs that grow up and they own corporations now.  One hand never knows what the other is doing and they mess it up all the time. It’s so confusing it’s almost comical.

I was harassed so bad by some people for something stupid and now I was called upon to explain myself for something equally stupid. All because I know something I’m not supposed to know about what these foolish people are not supposed to be doing.

I thought these people were going to waterboard me, but they probably would have put me on the board upside down and done my feet instead of my head. “Whoops! Now my feet are all wet! “Hey, that tickles! Ok, I’ll tell you what I know!!!!” You’re all a bunch of morons , OK????” Now please stop and don’t mess up my pedicure!

They kept asking if I would let them keep my stuff in their room since it was safe. Oh, yea, like that’s really gonna happen. I trust everyone with my documents. If I did, would I really be in this mess that you have orchestrated yourselves?Then you can change around some more things and sign my name on some more papers that I didn’t sign. I’m sure you’ve done that quite a bit.

I see how all of this works. They have people threaten you. They tell you what they are holding over your head. Pretending it is all so ominous.

Then you wait. Wait for the Lord. He is the deliverer and His deliverance is swift. His deliverance is not messy. It is with order and clean. Not a stone is left unturned and every dark thing is brought to the light.

He casts a wide net and is very patient. This is because He wants to be sure that He allows time and also to see all who are guilty receives due punishment.

How many people are going to be caught when that time comes? One implicates another. It will be remarkable. I will see it with my own eyes. It is His promise to me.

Just be sure you are backing the right horse.

The Great Tribunal


I had to fly up for a meeting for something . As I sat and listened I was grieved in my spirit. I wondered. Why am I really here? In the scheme of things, is this significant? I mean. by comparison? Then I listened as the woman was giving her account. Nothing was making sense. I wanted to scream out, “That’s not true!!! But the Lord wouldn’t allow it. I wanted to ask, “Why are you saying this?” But the Lord wouldn’t allow this either. So I sat. I listened. I wondered. What motivation someone, who had never met me would have to say this.

At the end of it all the Lord reminded me of something. “I contend with all who contend with you.” This is a fact. When she said, there was no way that she would change her mind about an unjustified discipline she had given me, I remembered this. And I began to cry. Not tears for myself, but tears for her. I cannot bear it when the lord speaks to me about the punishment of the wicked He speaks to me as I am sitting right in front of them at times. As they are speaking in a contempt for me. I can hear it in their voice and I have no idea why except that I carry the truth in me. And yet, I cry because I know, He is going to deal with them.

It just happened to a girl that was doing some very cruel things to me. Harassing me in a way that was unspeakable. I had lost a brother to aids and she teamed up with someone to bring this to the forefront of my life once again, but in a painful manner. As a means of dragging me through this to traumatize me. Her and another girl wanted to joke about these things in my life as a means of tormenting me. As I agonized over this the Lord told me once again, “stand back and watch as He would deal with them as a loving Father protects His children from their enemies.” When I felt I could take no more, this girl emailed me and told me she had major problems visiting her and she basically was ‘signing off from my life’ She sent a very kind letter, but a goodbye email. I told her I would continue to pray for her.

The Lord is very specific. Pray for these people, yet have mercy mixed with fear and “have nothing to do with them.” They will hurt you. Their hearts are callous. Yet, I hurt when these kinds of people speak lies and seem to hate for no apparent reason. Of course its something I cannot understand, even thought the Lord already told us, “the darkness hates the light and they will hate us because of the truth.” I want so badly for them to come to the knowledge of the truth. And this is the reason I cry.

I kept thinking of the word, “no weapon formed against me shall prosper and every tongue that rises up against me in judgement shall be condemned.”

A Family Held Captive


It’s the dream that my girlfriend gave me in 2001. I had it tucked into my bible since then.

I have used it as a guide in this last year. The Lord has revealed it’s meaning in entirety and the people that are in it don’t even know who they are yet. All the players are part of Gods plan to bring about redemption.

I have suffered such hardship and terror that it has taken a toll. No one could even imagine, but it has been to bring about my own righteousness as well as the salvation of others. I have felt a loneliness beyond understanding at times. This is all part of the dream. The woman that had this dream is an intercessor and she prays constantly. As I stated before, she could not believe that she was so instrumental in being used by God in this way. But she shouldn’t be surprised. He always uses the humble servants to bring about His greatest purposes.

I will tell the dream exactly as she gave it to me on 11/14/01

Dear Carrie,

This is the dream I read to you from my journal. A family held captive is how I titled it in my journal. Jesus the doctor who came for the sick.

The dream started with a woman kidnapped. She was in her bathroom. She had her makeup and 2 gold chains and someone came in to hand her a check. She escapes and continues to run and hide in fear. She hides in doctors offices and hotels. She ends up in what appears to be a doctors office or bank. A man gives her refuge. The man calls for help. She says my daddy knows everything, but she speaks in fear and doubt as if it is a lie because she has not told her father her situation. The dream continues, the rest of the family becomes imprisoned searching for stairways and exit doors for escape. Doors sound alarms they are surprised and again ensnared. Every time repeating the same behavior expecting a different outcome, yet repeating the same way of escape. Escaping once running through the desert, finding refuge in a church.

There are two brothers, one fits into the sanctuary feeling safe and hidden, the other too big to make it through the door. The scene looks like Alice in Wonderland. Not willing to leave the other behind, they are captured together. Later one escapes prison.

What seems like years later the other is released from prison. The prisoner still make the same decision. Tries to go through the alarmed exit door. The other warns, No! But the door opens enough to trigger the same alarm. But this time they both escape. The entire large family is released! Set Free! Restored to joy at the time the last brother is released from prison.

They reflect; how did we escape? The alarm on the door was triggered yet we were not ensnared. It seemed as those in authoritiy were looking down watching and directing their escape plan through all their bad decisions.

It was their time to escape to be set free and no alarm or entrapment was able to stop their release from prison. Every obstacle was lifted, every stumbling block removed. A clear path to freedom was set before them. Not by the power of their decisions, but because a way of escape had already been prepared.

There was a part of the dream I remember later and wrote at the bottom of my journal page. It seem to deal with being careful not to be angry or offended when others try to put a label on us.

I am continuing to pray for you.

Now it wasn’t  until recently that the Lord revealed the minute details of this dream to me and it was most amazing. Gods is merciful and slow to anger. Full of compassion and He loves mankind. He is not willing that any man should perish but that all should come to a knowledge of the truth. It is an amazing thing to me, but it is not without suffering. Believe me. This is a lonely road. Very few people whose souls cannot be purchased and some can be bought for virtually nothing at all. In the end the Lord promises to restore us, but we must always remember that it is the souls of men that are at stake and even one man’s soul is worth more than anything this world can offer!

“For what is it if a man shall gain the whole world but lose his own soul?” What we can see at the end of this dream is a picture of grace. Unmerited favor. Nothing that can be earned but is freely given. This is what Christ offers all of us and the only release from prison is truth. It is the truth that makes us free.

Grandma and the Saggy Pants Bandit


You can run but you can't hide!

You can run but you can't hide!

Today I had to get my car fixed and as always there was a character in the waiting room. The woman was talking from the minute she walked in. Not really caring whether any one was listening.

I noticed that she was missing most of her teeth and that she had her left hand bandaged with the two middle fingers bandaged together. I didn’t want to encourage her too much by asking and assumed she would tell me in short order anyway, so I listened as she continued.

The tv was on and a plane had crashed into a house. The expletives were flying out of her mouth faster than that plane had gone down and I was shocked, as she looked like she could have been someones grandma. In fact she told me that she felt the boy liked her because she reminded him of his own grandmother. Hmmm, hard to imagine how he treated his grandma since he was holding a gun to this woman and later hurt her by shoving her.

She started telling us about the conversation she’d had with him. “I was sitting outside on a bucket reading a newspaper when I saw him walking up. He had on some pants that were rubbing together. Swish, swish, swish. You know like the sound of that material a raincoat makes, when it rubs together.” Yes, I told her, that’s why he’s called the saggy pants bandit.” “Oh, really? Where do they call him that? On the news?” “Yes,” I told her. He’s been on all the time. “I know, he hit 28 stores already!”

Next she proceeds to tell me and another woman that just joined us, “he wasn’t black like they said. I looked at his eyes and they were strange. It was white around them and he had a mask on. he looked almost oriental. But when I looked at him he was wearing some cheap dollar store glasses and they were caught on his glasses, so I told him he needed to fix it. I told him his eye looked a little weird and I said, “what’s the matter with your eye?”

At this I started laughing so hard. I couldn’t picture grandma trying to fix his mask for him and trying to figure out what was wrong with his eyes. Perhaps he had black makeup on and missed his eye area. Then she said, “and he talked real weird too. Like real high. Almost like a girl.” Well, I couldn’t resist. “I figured it out!” I said. It’s Michael Jackson! The other woman fell out laughing! Yea, that’s true and he’s white now too!

Of course grandma was already moving on to the next detail of the case, because she had become a self proclaimed detective. She told us that she now scouts out all of the local 7/11’s and tells everyone what to look for, including the police officer’s that are parked nearby. She better be careful, they may get suspicious that they’re working in tandem.

She told me that when they were inside the store he shoved her and she bumped into a counter. She said she kept whining about the pain in her fingers as he held the gun to her. “He kept staring at my fingers as if he was really concerned. That was funny. Then he looked at the other two people he had on the ground and said, “she’ll live.”

Ok, this whole scene sounds pretty surreal. She said he told her to get on the ground and then forgot that he needed someone to get up to open the register. Hmmm, this guy really isn’t bright. After all she told him they only had about $30 and he’s still willing to go through all of this? No wonder he has to wear such a cheap get-up to rob places. Who can afford anything elaborate when you only get a few bucks? Hey buddy, go to the party store and get the Blues Brother’s costume that I got for my son. (Earlier Post) At least you’ll get an upgrade and as I stated in my post, he looked more like a rabbi, so you may be able to take collections on your way out the door as well!

So, he got a total of $28 and the woman got a whole lot of excitement as she regaled us with the tale. She was thrilled that she made the news and I certainly did remember seeing her. She is pushed and you can hear her say, “ouch, my hand!”

She didn’t get her 15 minutes yet, but if she keeps hanging out at these places, I’m sure she will be the one to single handedly bring him in. Then I can say, “hey, I knew that woman when she was just a nobody!”

You Belong In Hollywood!


Yes, it stunned the audience. Why human beings always judge by appearances is beyond human comprehension.The Lord loves to surprise man.

When choosing His anointed, He always chose the ones least expected. David was not even in the midst of the sons. He was shepherding the sheep when the prophet was looking for the anointed one. “Do you have another son?” “Yes, but he is with the sheep.”

Who would have thought that he would have been the one to slay the giant? What did the prophet say? “Man judges by outward appearance, but God judges the heart.”

I always remember when I used to take the bus from downtown Milwaukee to my home. I lived in the inner city. However, I had the opposite problem than most, I guess. Almost reverse racism and I didn’t mind. But it was somewhat humorous. I would get on the bus and sit.

One night as I sat waiting, a guy sat behind me and began his taunts. “Say baby. I said, say baby! You should be in Hollywood! Where are you going at this time at the night? I know you don’t live around here!”

As I continued to ride and ignore as I knew how to do, I listened to this fool go on and on with his nonsense. Then he said, “Say, Hollywood, you must live in River Hills. What you doing on this bus?” At that I had to laugh. River Hills was a ride north and a very nice suburb. My aunt lived there and if you could afford to live there you certainly wouldn’t be riding the bus.

I finally reached my stop at Teutonia Avenue and as I pulled the cord and started to rise, I heard him in a startled voice yell out, “oh no! I know you don’t live in this neighborhood! I turned and smiled as I walked to the door. As it turned out, he had a ride further north which could only mean he lived in a nicer neighborhood than I did.

Now all I could do was laugh when I walked into my house as I thought of that dude and how he judged me. Yes, I looked like I was some girl with money from the suburbs. Why? I have no idea. However, it was a conclusion he had already made from the minute he laid eyes on me.

God is the one that blesses us with certain things, however, if I had my choice it will always be to be blessed with a kind heart. Just as everyone in the audience with Susan Boyle prejudged her, the minute she opened her mouth, an angel sang and dispelled all of their judgement. This is love.

The Light ALWAYS Penetrates Darkness


It  is a fact. A flame in the dark will always shine in darkness  . The dark does not engulf the light. It is the opposite. The light shines in the dark. The darker it is the brighter the light.

This is why God chooses the light in this dark world. The darkness hates the light and tries to eliminate it from it’s presence. It cannot stand to have it around. But the light knows this and persists. It understands that it is the purpose of the light to give direction to those who need it.

Of course there are always a few that want to remain in darkness. This is a sadness to the light that cannot be understood. But to those that are drawn to the joy it makes the light have momentary happiness.

The darkness has told the light, “you are too bright, you need to tone it down.”  This is something spiritual yet they see it in a natural sense. “Yes, I guess I am too bright,” she said. “at least for this world” And that’s when all her trouble begins. But yet she grieved for those that had hurt her so deeply. She could see that they only hurt her because they were empty inside themselves. A deep emptiness that they could not fill and she longed to tell them of the savior that she had found, but they could not hear her because of the hate in their hearts for the light.

The darkness that hates the light. One day they will know the truth. The truth. The truth that makes men free.eiffel-tower-night

Elijah’s Cup


Always waiting for my redeemer

Always waiting for my redeemer

Well the Passover is still being celebrated and next it will be the Easter celebration. But what was Passover? It is what my last post was about. It was a remembrance of the release from captivity for all the nation of Israel. God’s miraculous power and the way He designed the release was all a foreshadow of the coming messiah. Everything that the nation of Israel was told to do was to point to a future event.

Now we know that Jesus sat at a Passover when he had his “last supper.” This was all part of the plan and signs to those that had spiritual eyes and ears. The Jews that understood all the prophecies of the prophets could draw a picture and confirm that Christ was indeed who He claimed to be. The fulfillment of the prophecies all culminated with His hanging from the cross and the resurrection. However, how could so many Jews celebrated Passover and not understand that the messiah had indeed come and He is coming back again? Well for many Jews, just as many non-Jews, the Passover is just another ritual. They are remembering the past, however, have no idea that this pointed to Christ and His ministry on this earth. How can they know if they have not searched for the truth, like many of us? This is when you will see the many symbols within the Passover and why they were told to celebrate in this manner. God wants to reveal Himself to all of us that are seeking.

At the Seder table you can see the symbols of Christ everywhere. It is rich with the pictures of Him. The matzo, as I stated is unleavened bread and leaven was always referred to in a symbolic mannerm, as sin. This is why God foreknew that this would be Christ sitting at His own Seder before He was crucified and passing this. Breaking it into pieces to share with each of his disciples and saying, “Take eat, this is my body which is broken for you.” Now He told them as they ate, they should  no longer do this as a remembrance of their release from Egypt, but in remembrance of Him” This is why He also took the cup, which is standard with four glasses of wine. As the Jews had done year after year, they drank the cups in remembrance of the release from bondage as Hebrew slaves. Now Christ told them to drink of this cup, for this is now my blood shed for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” He told them that this would be the New Covenant that was being instituted by the shedding of His own blood. This was the lamb replacing the lamb that was sacrificed at twilight on Passover. When Christ was crucified it was at the exact time that the High Priest was making the animal sacrifice in the temple. This was all part of God’s plan.

When you look at the matzo, you will see that it is striped with lines. It also has pierce markings throughout. This is done with a tool to keep it from forming bubbles as it bakes. This also is a picture. The prophet Isaiah, lived approximately 500 years before Christ came to earth, However when you read Isaiah 53, you will read every prophetic sign that the prophet pointed out. This includes the stripes and piercings. ( Isaiah 53:5)”He was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities, the punishment that brought us peace and by His stripes we are healed.

We can see that the Lord knew that what He was telling the disciples was that up until this point you have celebrated Passover in remembrance of the past. That was just a picture. This is now the New Covenant and you will celebrate the Passover with new meaning. I AM the Passover.My blood being shed for you will cause the Angel of Death to pass over you upon death. You will not suffer the second death.

Now when you look at the lamb shank bone on the Passover table, you can remember what Christ has done. “He was led like a lamb to the slaughter and as a sheep before her shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.” (Isaiah 53:7)

The Jews were required to sacrifice the lamb, however the temple was destroyed in 70 AD and no sacrifice could be made anyway. But we know  this to be true because the sacrifice had already been made.

The cup is placed at the head of the table for Elijah. The prophet that would be the forerunner of the Messiah. He was the one who would announce His coming and did so through John the Baptist. This cup is always waiting for the prophet and the children go and check the door to see if the messiah has arrived.

The most amazing part of the Seder is the Afikoman. The matzo is broken into three pieces and hidden in the linen. The Afikoman is the middle piece. It is a picture of Christ wrapped in linen and hidden in the tomb.The father takes the middle piece, symbolic of Christ, the second part of the Godhead,(the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit) and breaks it in two pieces. (His body broken for us.) The larger piece of the Afikoman is taken and hidden somewhere until later when the children will try and find it. “Seek the Lord while He may be found.” (Isaiah 55:6)At the end of dinner this piece is broken into smaller pieces and shared with every person at the table. Hence, Christ sharing himself with His followers. He did this symbolically when He passed the broken pieces around the table and told them to “take eat, this do in remembrance of Me.”

The third cup of wine at the Seder is the Cup of Redemption. It is the new covenant that Christ shared with His disciples. This He said, “is the new covenant made with my blood. As you drink, do this in remembrance of Me.”

The disciples had a keen understanding of what Christ was saying, because they knew that He was telling them that a new covenant was being established, however, they did not quite understand that He would have to literally die.

At the Seder the bitter herbs are eaten. This is symbolic of our own bitter lives before release from the captivity of sin. We also remember the suffering of the Messiah as we eat them. The horror of our own sin, placed upon Him. The Father could not even look upon Him, because He bore our sin as He hung from the cross. This is when Christ felt abandoned, “my God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” What a desolate feeling of loneliness He must have suffered on our own behalf, at that moment.

The salt water that the herbs are dipped into, are symbolic of the tears of our own bondage to slavery and how much we suffered before finding our redemption in Christ.

A wonderful book for believers to use for a Seder is called,Celebrate the Feasts, by Martha Zimmerman. There are quite a few on the market now, but for a christian version, you may look in a Christian bookstore, or even a Messianic bookstore. The Passover is a rich experience and it is so incredible to finally receive a greater revelation of what our Lord actually did for us.

Now after you had experienced a Seder, you may say, as I did; “How is it the Jew does not see their Christ is the center of this whole dinner?” Well, because, they only have half of the story. Just as Gentile believers cling to their traditions and have no understanding of Old Testament practices and why these were so important. The Jew that has not come to know what Christ actually did accomplish, will not be able to see that He indeed fulfilled everything that their own prophets foretold. It is only as they learn of Christ that they can actually see He is the purpose of the Passover. So once again, I encourage Gentile believers to learn about the Lord’s festivals so that your eyes will also be opened and you can open the eyes of others.

Previous Older Entries