The Covenant


I have been thinking about the covenant and it’s importance so much lately and the most amazing thing happened just the other day. Since I have been grieving my father and I know it’s for good reason, since he died in 1988, I believe the Lord is shaking things up and bringing hidden things to light.

Well a few years ago, I had pulled a copy of my credit report and noticed that someone had taken out a mortgage  and made me a co-buyer with them in 1998, when I knew that was impossible. I think I had already written about this in my last post.  The strangest thing was that it never been reported until 2007 on my credit report. This alarmed me and was the reason for my brother and I taking a trip to Milwaukee to find out what was happening with my father’s estate. Before leaving I went into my important documents to see what I might need.  I noticed that I had in my possession a copy of my father’s marriage license to his second wife and I would have had no way of getting that except that he would have placed that in my documents before I ever left his house.

I looked at this again the other day and wondered why he gave this to me. I certainly didn’t have a copy of my mother’s and his marriage license, nor did I want it. As I looked closer at this paper it stated that it was valid only for 30 days after issuance and in Lake County, Illinois only. What was this supposed to mean? He used to say when he was really drunk, (which was most of the time unfortunately, that he wasn’t legally married anyway. He had asked my mom to take him back repeatedly, but she wasn’t having any more of that life. My day had made his bed and that was the end of that. I loved him none the less. But his second wife had nothing in her heart for my father and that could be seen by the way she treated all of his children. She was colder than the ice cold draft’s that he drank in the Ole Lamp Inn on the night’s that he came home from work.

I believe my father was speaking from the grave, the very same words that he spoke that last night that I saw him and he wanted to make sure that I understood him loud and clear. “Give my love to your mother.” How can a man stand outside of a house that he lives in with another woman and speak such words? Yet these are the words he spoke and I will go to my grave with those words echoing in my ears and stand before the Lord as my witness, and repeat them as his last wishes. This woman never honored or respected my father, nor did her children.They mocked him at his own funeral and tormented us not only in our lives but on that day.And if he knew what they did he would have been furious.

 I adored my father and did whatever he asked, and that included when he had asked me to humble myself and make up to her just to have a relationship with my father.I bit the bullet and did it all because of him. But the minute he was gone she knew that those ties were as well.

After my father died, my brother went to her home and she stood at the screen door and stated, “now that your father’s dead, there’s no reason to continue a relationship with you or your family.” He said, “I’d like to see my grandma!” (Who happened to live with her at the time.) She said, “well, she doesn’t want to see you either.” “What? Is that true ,grandma?” “Yes, that’s true,” She said. So much for loving my father!

This woman then single handedly proceeded to destroy every relationship we had with our aunts and we were never allowed access to them again. I don’t know what she said about us, but we were the only bloodline of my father’s and she probably lied about all of us in order to sustain the broken relationships. I’m sure it was all about money. But nevertheless, they all had freedom of choice and they made the decision to cut us off. Never asking us any questions at all. This woman had no children related to my father, yet they believed whatever she told them.

When my son was born, I tried to send them all pictures of him and said that my father would want them all to know their nephew and would be very hurt about this, yet not one of them contacted me.

Now, as I said the covenant means something very powerful to the Lord. It cannot be broken. It is spiritual and it’s a bond made in heaven and although people make it lightly, he speaks of it in a powerful way. He is the author of the covenant between two people. He says, “Whatever is bound in heaven is bound on earth and whatever is loosed in heaven is loosed on earth.” He speaks about two or more gathering together in His name. The power that is drawing from heaven that cannot be seen, yet blessings and curses come from this power and people that have no spiritual understanding enter into these agreements every day. Business transactions that they take for granted. They open up the heaven lies and warfare takes place and they wonder, what is happening?

It’s would be almost comical, if it weren’t so tragic. If human beings could just get a grasp on what they were doing spiritually we would not be in such a mess right now. The blessings and the curse are in the power of these covenants.

I was taken into  covenants treacherously and now have had to suffer along with the people that have taken me into them. Yet, these people have no idea what they have done. They just continue to go on with their corrupt ways and think that they will not have to give account for their actions. But the Lord does hold them accountable. And to those of us that are sensitive in the spirit, he reveals the most amazing things, long before they happen. And the Lord will hold the people at the very highest level accountable, because they are the ones that hold the power, yet they still try to hide behind the weakest ones. He will deal with them.

Now even in my marriage, my ex husband made vows to my father and he broke those vows and when vows are broken the bride returns to her father. But my father is no longer here, so I have a deep pain in my soul. A longing for my father, because I remember my walk with him down the aisle as he gave me away. And now I always remember his last kiss goodbye. My father could never do anything that would take my love away. And I sense that this evil woman lied to everyone and told them that his own children did not love him. But my father and I shared a special bond. One that no one could take away. His wife wanted her daughter to have that bond, but she couldn’t have it, because she wasn’t his daughter. I was. She was always trying to be me, but she couldn’t be me. I was his birthright and she was the impost er. I was the daughter of covenant. It was like Ishmael and Isaac. But this woman was Hagar. She was always trying to force a covenant that was false. Yet even Ishmael had a bloodline to Abraham, where this girl does not. She is no relation to my father whatsoever, and although at one point I used to feel a sense of pity for her, I lost it long ago.  At some point you cross over from being one of the deceived to becoming the deceiver. How can a bad tree bear good fruit? I could see it plainly when I lived in this house. This woman and her two daughter’s always conspiring to do evil. It was an abomination. My father always caught in the middle and I always pretending not to know how evil they were, out of love for him.  And I have a feeling that even now from her grave she is still scheming. Be sure to know, your sin will find you out. But the Lord catches the crafty in their craftiness. He will bring justice to victory and in the end His covenant is the only covenant. 

Then I think what pain his own soul was in and try to move past my own pain. Something is happening in the spiritual realm to be sure, the things at my job brought all this to the surface and it was never dealt with and now here I am uncovering this at this time in my life. It’s not by chance. There is a healing about to take place and it’s in God’s time.This is why I have an unsettled feeling in my spirit. It’s as if the Lord is telling me something is happening and I need to find out what it is. “The Lord directs the path of a righteous man.” He does not allow His servants to come to harm. And it is in His time when He brings things to light. Only He knows when and why because He sees the end to the beginning, unlike us. We want to rush things.

So I wait because I know that my father must have put that paper in my documents for a reason. Then my mother told me the other day, “yes your Aunt Marilyn called me before your dad’s death and said, “you need to get in touch with Don, he wants to talk to you. But I didn’t know how to get in touch with him. They didn’t have cell phones back then and I couldn’t call the house.”

“Well, I said, he probably wanted to tell you what he told me. That he loved you.” Then I told her that he was trying to get in touch with my brother too, but he didn’t get in touch with him either. I was the only one that saw him that last time and sometimes I’m angry at him for leaving me in such a way. I find myself screaming at him as if he can hear me and if he could I would say it. “You know it’s really crappy what you did to me and I would never do it to anyone that I love!” That’s really breaking a covenant with someone in the worst possible way for all eternity and harming someones soul beyond repair.

Every time I look at my son and his long legs while he’s playing baseball I want to cry. I think of all the years that he’s been robbed of and what he might think while looking at my son out on the field. He’s built just like my dad and I can’t help but smile. Just the thought of it gets me choked up. I was the one that really offered him support. His wife controlled him and that’s what she hated about me I didn’t have to control my dad, I loved my dad and he listened to me out of love and respect. I was a threat to her and that she could not handle.

At times I find myself getting angry that my father even shares a grave next to this woman, yet the Lord reminds me, “he isn’t there, he’s only sleeping.” Yes, that’s true. When I am in my worst agony I have to remember, I will see him again. And then I will be on the other side of all of this and be able to say “oh grave where is thy sting? Oh death where is thy victory?” But for this woman,may she have found repentance before she died, however, I doubt that happened, by what I suspect she has done and may the Lord have mercy on her soul.

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Googleau
    Jun 29, 2010 @ 14:20:08

    Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now. Keep it up!
    And according to this article, I totally agree with your opinion, but only this time! 🙂


    • flygurlual
      Jun 29, 2010 @ 20:19:11

      Well thank you, John.
      I believe that all my suffering has made me a ‘new creation,’ and along with that, I may have become more creative. At least that’s what I’m praying for.
      Your kind words are very encouraging.
      May you be blessed!


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